Time Megeve

Team Ranch. The ranch decided to try a race in Noshow land. Time Megeve. The Alps. The month of June. Easy access through Geneva, a hotel not too expensive. This race had all the potential to be a classic on the Ranch calendar.
Saturday morning the team arrives in Megeve, sort the cars out and we load up for the 1 hour drive to the highclass ski resport of Megeve, France. We had no idea what to expect.

We arrive. 28 degrees C. Alps everyhwere. A magnificent view of Mt Blanc not far away. Wow. This is incredible. Zinni says its' the highest mtn in europe. Cali disagrees. The repsone from Zinni? "Ok, fine Mt Kiliminjaro is higher but ... " huh? Not surprisingly, the word terrone may have been used after that comment.

At the first roundabout in town we see the stadium and go to register. Plenty of bike porn for those interested. We had a cursory glance but were more business than pleasure and headed for the hotel to get settled and then find some lunch.



2 rooms, 2 guys to a room was a much improved scenario after the nightmare of 5 guys and a room at Gimondi. Net net - the place was comfortable and inexpensive even if the owner wasn't the most mannered with us.
So checked in, bike assembled and we head into town to have a sandwich and a beer. On the walk back after lunch Farace looks at Noshow and says, "hey Noshow, i think i am going to take a nap." Noshow responds by saying, "Listen, in all my years, and I am only talking about my experiences, a nap this late in the day won't be good for sleeping tonight." So we meander back to the hotel. Lay down for a couple minutes and Noshow is asleep and under the covers before Farace can finish speaking about how in love he really is with Sarita. An hour later, upon awakening, noshow hears, "And that, Noshow, is why I love her so."


So off to dinner at the slowest restaurant in Megeve, a couple glasses of red and the team heads back for a sleepy night in cool and breezy Megeve. Dreams of Sarita in all of our heads now.


Sunday. A 6:30 start - Cali and Zinni upset at breakfast because Noshow and Chiche don't go upstairs to walk down as a team. We have the "cyclists breakfast" of cold toast and fake powdered orange drink, pack our things and ride to the start. It looks to be a beautiful day. Hot air balloons drifting through the valleys of the alps, a view of Mt Blanc not far away. And the sun coming up over the mtns. What a great way to begin a race.
8:30 the bell tolls and we roll through town. 4 members ot the Ranch in their first french alps race. We have 115km of alps ahead of us. Focus.

We roll for about 20 minutes to the first hill. Not too bad. Maybe 45 minutes of climbing but couldn't have been more than 6% at its worst. Over the top of that and we have a great decent touching speeds of 75-78kph. Was beautiful. Noshow gets a flat and the team waits for him. Brilliant. Climb #2. More difficult. Ths climb takes well over an hour and the team is spreading out a bit trying to climb at their own tempos. Cali, spinning away, relaxed, eating up kilometers. Farace grinding along like Jan Ullrich in a heavy gear. Zinni churning his chainring eating tarmac under his wheels and Noshow shifting to his triple as he begins to feel his 39 years.
Over the top - Zinni flats, Noshow climbs back up to help him with the change and off they go again. The temamates, Cali and farace waiting around the corner. We're at 4 hours now and see the turn off for the 85km loop. Not even a hesitation for the team, we go for 115. Noshow flats again on the decent and almost loses it. Realizes his tube stem isn't long enough and we wait again for a gentleman spanish rider to make a trade for a tube that fits (Cali negotiates) and up climb 3. We were warned that the first 3km were difficult. What we weren't warned about was the climb was more like 20km and the whole climb was STEEP. Cals and Noshow start to bicker about 1/3 of the way through (MEIGHT) and Cali takes off. Noshow not feeling it but angry chases him and tries to drop him. About 10 minutes into the "try to drop CALIi move" he looks back over the curve in the road to see where he is and hears a chipper, "Hey Buddy! Right here!" About an inch off noshow's wheel. Darn it. Thought he had the flu.
Up over the top, a decent into the valley again and the team heads for home. At this point, the team is looking ragged. Zinni is covered in salt from dried sweat. Noshow can't think straight, Cali, looking feverish and Chiche looking calm somehow. 33 degrees C - it's hot. The road drifts up slightly and at this point it saps you but the finish is so close. We will make it. We will make it as a team. Zinni had slowed on the decent to ponder where in fact Mt Kiliminjaro actually was so the other 3 teammates wait before the finish so we could all cross together. This race was ridden as a team and we wanted to finish as a team.
We all arrived in Megeve unprepared for this race. 2 guys not trained well, 1 with the flu and one with a cold. The Ranch wasn't willing to not ride it so we bucked up, held together as a team the entire 6 hours of riding and are the better for it. I, for one, am proud of the effort and the support of fellow ranchers. Once again I am impressed at the character of the riders I am associated with. Pure quality.

Dreiländer Giro

YO, RiderStemCell will be starting the Dreiländer this Sunday......with his new Machine....and better leg......and bigger Lungs....and a stronger heart!

I´ll be thinking of you all as I power over Stilfsjoch....

Wish you were here.

Loe Stem

That Which Does Not Kill Me....

For Ranch riders and cycling afficionados who harbor idle curiousity about the fringes of human potential and the darkside of the craft, I offer an entertaining article about the current king and upcoming favorite of 2009 solo RAAM starting in two weeks -- the Race Across America

(2006 RAAM Promo Video) (2008 RAAM Promo Video)

That Which Does Not Kill Me Makes Me Stranger, NY Times, 5 Feb 2006

RiderZoe's Race Debut

RiderZoe makes the Ranch race Tour debut at the Acura L.A. Bike Tour! Up at 3am for the 5am start in the dark this past memorial day, the beloved RiderZ won the hearts of adoring fans among a throng of thousands riding the 40km road course covering the route just hours before the running of the L.A. Marathon! Despite dozing off for nearly 1/2 the ride in early morning twilight, RiderZoe shows off the new Chariot side carrier -- accompanied by Ridermama and Riderturbo -- and makes her public Ranch riding debut in flying colours!

GIMONDI

What a weekend. The Ranch is alive. 4 from London, one from Paris. Milan Linate airport.

Noshow the first one in, waiting and having a coffee machiatto. And why not? The guy's in Italy. Was delicious.

After a 30 minute wait, 3 more come waltzing out of Terminal A (there is no B), gulp a few Italian sandwiches and off to find the van to transport the team to Bergamo. It was 9:30am. Well done Ranch.

RiderChiche shows up like it's gameday. He is skinny, shaved, has a plastic cover over the rental van details and breaks into argentine accented italian as he speaks with the rental woman. UPennWharton indeed. This guy was prepared. Noshow observing began to get butterflys wondering what other kind of preparation he had done. Rollatoke never got him that far.

The van was perfect - Chiche as driver (normal) and 30 minutes later we were pulling into Bergamo looking for the Hostel. Yes - you read correctly - Hostel. (Claim to fame is best Hostel in Europe.) To be fair - we will go back - they were superb. And not least of which the bus went directly from the hostel to Citta Alta. Which was discovered much too late by TeamRanch but soon enough to enjoy one ride back from the resto saturday night.

We began the saturday by a spin over to the stadium to check in. The same issue with having no insurance - Cali gives his telephone number as insurance card and adds a number. Zinni changes the last number of that to 1 additional. Ok, then Noshow gets stopped and Zinni proceeds to explain that all of our insurance numbers are the same except for the last digit which goes up by one each time. Ok, sign the back of the paper saying you won't sue us. Done - race numbers and chips in hand we roll out of there surrounded by massive amounts of bike porn. The Ranch wasn't distracted. We had business to take care of. First up - The Giro d'Italia was making a showing in Bergamo that day. So we spin down the road getting waved on by spectators and policia alike until we were stopped and told no further. A glance at the team cars and lunch in a cafe on the side of the road with one of Gimondi's old friends was a treat. The riders came through like a pack of sinew about 35kph looking relaxed. They had just picked up their 100km snack and were replacing calories.

A few minutes of that and we were back off to the hostel to shower up and see if we could catch the finish in town. Hostel room - 4 bunks beds - room for 8. We were 5. One shower with no curtain, drain in the floor and the toilet basically in the shower with you. Normal?

After the clean up - we walk into town, see the riders come flying through on their way to the finish and head up to Citta Alta for some sights.



A bit of Terrone cheese and hams, a small beer, a few photos, dinner at the Ranch restaurant where we ate last year and bus back to the Ostello. Who do we find - but SpeedoRedio out doing hill repeats on his new Derosa King. A good look at his new ride and we are lights out by 10pm struggling to fall alseep but distracted by RiderCali dryshaving his legs.

After a hazy sleep of strange dreams, the sounds of snoring vibrating throught he halls, the Ranch had multiple blackberry alarms rouse them around 5:30 am.

Trying to negotiate 5 men for the SS and S before the race was interesting but accomplished and we drift downstairs to find any breakfast there might have been earlier completely torn into and gone. We satisfied ourselves with warm milk and a dry roll each and looked forward to getting on the bike. We could eat at the second food stop.

A line up with 2,500 other cyclists and within 20 minutes we were off.

Now Cali had clearly stated he was going to be on the rivet from the start to the finish so noshow decided to relax behind him and let him negotiate the crowds in the beginning. Reido drifted back into the pack clearly afraid to scratch his new ride (various shouts were claimed to be heard - YO! EASY ON THE BIKE! HEY! TOO CLOSE! GIMME SOME SPACE)) and Zinni waited for Chiche so they could ride support for each other.

Cali and noshow lead the pack up hill number 1. Zip along to hill number 2 and first Noshow rides away from Cali, then gets passed by Speido. Noshow stops for some water refills, eats a cookie and Cali comes spinning in. A quick refuel and water and off they were again on the course. Reido GONE. Lone wolf. Zinni behind us drops Chiche and waits at the water stop for him to arrive. After already waiting for him to change a flat earlier in the race and sharing his water bottle as Chiche forgot he would be thirsty and didn't fill his own(Wharton? nah) Zinni is expressing one of the Ranch qualities...take care of your fellow rancher. Generous to say the least. Chiche descending better than Zinni so he is waiting at the bottom of the hills so they can continue their ride together. More on this later...

So Reido is off and trying to improve of his time from last year. Cali and Noshow battling it out on hill number 3 which is really a double whammy. Cals tries to drop the noshow early on and kicks it into high gear while noshow could only watch him go confident of being able to catch him before the top. Zinni and Chiche playing cat and mouse and chiche descending to the bottom after the 3rd hill only to forget about Zinni and make a break for home conveinently forgetting the team spirit Zinni had exemplified.

Meanwhile, Noshow catches Cali and hides on his wheel for a few minutes before attacking 4 km from the top of this final climb. He gets a healthy 30meter lead and cannot keep the pace so sits down and glances back to see Cali's face go from an expression of panic to an expression of fistpump smugness knowing Noshow can't get away.

So 2 of the 3 parts of the team head for the finish. ReiderSpeidoReido turns right for the long course and crushes it. 5H50 minutes improving by a healthy 30 minutes from 2008. All those Verbier weekends paying off. Cali and Noshow head full gas for the finish and Cali skids through the last turn with one foot on the ground Barney Rubble style at about 40kph and head up sprints for the line, Noshow spins across 2 seconds after followed by the Italian train who helped pull us in.

Chiche is next across with Zinni pulling up a few minutes after muttering something uninteligible in italian while giving chiche the evil eye.

Reido being the anchor rider comes in a few minutes later after doing the long course with a fantastic time while swearing under his breath, "Flipping Terrones, stay away from my bike..."

So at the end, the Ranch meets back up at the hostel, has a shower, packs the van and stops off for one last bite to eat in Citta Alta Bergamo, Italy before heading back to the airport. It was a meal of 5 tired guys feeling really good about what they accomplished that day and patting each other on the backs - even if there may have been a bit of fun-poking at one another. All in good fun and victory for the Ranch. Thanks Roy Yan. You have created something special.

Photos to be posted this weekend.

Goin' Back to Cali

Sunny California. Bastion of beautiful beaches, body builders and babes in bikinis. Perhaps more pertinant to Ranch lifers, mecca for outdoor enthusiasts and all things ocean, mountain and desert.

This past weekend, a three-strong contingent of the Ranch cohort made an appearance at the Encinitas Triathlon. Located in surfer's paradise, just north of San Diego, where the sport of triathlon was born of Navy Seals in 1974, Ridermama, RiderZoe and Riderturbo (Turbine) appeared smiling brightly and proudly flying the Ranch colours.

Preparing for the event was not easy. Turbine solicited inspiration from the Oracle (RiderPitts) some half-the-world away in Hong Kong to drop pounds, lean up and get ready for race day, incorporating a regimen of austere diet, aerobic base building and Friday fasting to throw down when the chips were on table.

Despite teeming with a hunger to race, Ridermama was relegated to spectator with Riderzoe due to some group planning issues.

Wanting to take glory for the team, Turbine lined up front row behind the start tape with the big guns in a land where triathlon is no joke. Fueled by a pre-race regimen of Red Bull, push ups and delusions of Ranch victory, Turbo flew off the line like a trackstar and was first into the water with high knees and powerful arm drive.

A few seconds later, the dream was shattered as Turbine slammed head-on into a wall of incoming surf where mother nature shows no quarter to feeble displays of human aggression. After regaining composure, Turbine settled mid-pack among local ocean swimmers and swung into a rhythmic corkscrew tempo reflective of weekend race pace. The group swam straight outbound to the yellow triagular buoy, smoothly sighting intermediate orange buoys past the break, then turned shore bound by sighting off a towering palm tree onshore to complete the 750m swim leg.

Mentally discombobulated coming out of the water in 37th place, Turbine knew it was time to show the locals what the Ranch is about. After an extra 30 seconds fluff time in T1 donning the obligatory Ranch jersey, hell broke lose as Turbine locked, loaded and fired the Eddy Mercx Chrono TT bike down the road course, sighting the competition and picking them off one by one. After two laps comprising 20km, Turbine had restaked Ranch claim with a non-drafting bike split 37 minutes, ranking 7th amongst men same-age group competitors.

On to the run after a snappy one minute T2 and Turbine felt the pain of hard-won glory on the bike. Despite efforts to ignore the pain, lactic acid spiked and leg muscles seized as Turbine grit his teeth and knocked down the first of two laps. Inspired by fast veterans, fit women and Romanov's Pose Tech running technique, Turbine picked up the pace and brought home the second lap of the 5k run in style with Riderzoe and Ridermama providing paparazzi photos and raucous cheering along the finish line chute.

Overall, Turbine clocked a mid-rank 5k run split and won 14th overall position out of 63 competitors in the Men's 35-39 age group.

Ridermama and Riderzoe proudly showed Ranch colours throughout and curious onlookers in the crowd were heard whispering "who's the Ranch?"

Chalk up a few more kilometers, smiles and points for the Ranch on the global racing scene.

RANCH HUSTLE, LOYALTY, RESPECT.

The Yan - reflecting on the history of the ranch

Some of you might not be completely aware of the genisis of the ranch. As much rumour abounds - i thought it time to put facts straight. The ranch was the brainchild of Roy the Yan in the living room of 151 drayton gardens - a south kensington home to 5 young bankers - which became known amongst those in the know as "the ranch". Not sure why "the ranch" perhaps two of the fellows - mark begert (texas) and tom pitts (alberta) hailed from those places associated with pick up trucks and middle teeth.

Roy Yan (critirider) was a competitive cyclist as a junior living in philadelphia. Later he rode for the westpoint millitary academy (ARMY) and is still found racing in assorted criteriums across the east coast. Maintaining a strict cycling regimen in London he introduced the sport to the good men of the ranch in the late 90's - as an off season leg strengthening exercise. Off season as the men of the ranch were found skiing each and every weekend and were looking to optimise their ski season free from the ritual month of aches and pains.

To the casual observer - the ranch was soon mistaken for a soho bathhouse - as men were seen semi clothed with a full lather of sweat - pounding away at compu- trainers and bikes on rollers all in full view from the passers by on old brompton road. Not suprsingly with a bunch of AA personalities everything was a competition weather it be wattage, heart rate, or weight and progress was made. The mantra of cycling soon was accepted and endorsed as:

"To be a cyclist is to be a student of pain....at cycling's core lies pain, hard and bitter as the pit inside a juicy peach. It doesn't matter if you're sprinting for an Olympic medal, a town sign, a trailhead, or the rest stop with the homemade brownies. If you never confront pain, you're missing the essence of the sport. Without pain, there's no adversity. Without adversity, no challenge. Without challenge, no improvement. No improvement, no sense of accomplishment and no deep-down joy. Might as well be playing Tiddly-Winks."

It comes with little suprise that while 151 drayton gardens survived for 6 years - eventually girlfriends ultimatums, job transfers, and the realization that one should start living more adult like - the fellows moved out. But the cycling continued and new recruits were swept up with no real thesis beyond finding a few more willing guys to ride saturday mornings. An Argentine contingent led by Easy-E was exploring cycling and stumbled into the fray and suddenly with ridercrespo and riderchichi a group was re-emerging. Staple on a couple of colorado transplants (riderturbo) and the lone wolf - add some veteran leadership (riderhowe) some boston old money (ridernoshow), boston new money (ridercali) and a hersute terrone (riderzinni) - and the ranch cycling team was born.

Fellowship amongst like minded men in the midst of all the nonsense that bigger money and temptations can bring - sets one on a steady path. The acceptance of suffering is best done with some support from your pals - so the ranch started to take itself a bit more seriously - and results started to show. Everybody kinda had their own goals - whether it be a sub 20 loop of richmond park, losing a few pounds, or dropping one of your pals who was needling you all week on the subida de la muerte in turville. Remembering at base the ranch was a bunch of adult men trying hold off middle aged expansion - and looking to find the discipline to just be plain healthier. The 4 or 5 races in europe each year were a bonus and served to pause - a pause to see wonderful parts of the continent - a pause at the starting line to reflect on ones training and state of being - and a pause to be aware enough that these memories are going to be stored away and reflected on and replayed over the years to come. The catch all phrase for 2009 is make it yours - a somewhat selfish "only child" line - but i think the point is to maintain a balance in all things - which is stressed and applauded each day with each rancher holding the other to task.

So the ranch has shaped up into a core bunch of guys that have developed into pretty good weekend cyclists. They maintain enough perspective that they can laugh at themselves when they drop a chain, or get passed by a bunch of girls on pink pinarellos. A number of ranchers have dispatched to different countries - but still maintain daily contact over bloomberg chat and post the odd blog to reaffirm their membership. They became virtual friends with a tri-athelete in colorado, a stem cell researcher in frankfurt, and were cited in the cyclopassion bike calander. The site meter shows 6,000 visits with 12,000 page views. All of this - its fun to think - is the result of a hedge fund manager from philadelphia - who found himself in London - living with a few numbnuts - and said - lets see if some of these muppets can learn to ride.